What it is
Daily Sync gives the two of you one question a day to answer together. You pick a category, a new question opens each day, and each of you writes an answer. Your partner's answer stays hidden until you've written yours, so neither of you copies the other. It's a short daily ritual that gives you something to talk about besides "how was your day".
How it works in Phorb
- On the Today tab, tap the Daily Sync card. The first time, Phorb shows how it works and opens the Question Category sheet.
- Pick a category. Each one shows how far you've got, such as "0 of 30". Either of you can change the category, and it changes for both of you.
- A new question opens each day at midnight in your own time zone.
- Open today's question, write your answer and tap send. If you're stuck, each question comes with two suggestions.
- Until you answer, your partner's reply shows as "Answer to see what they wrote". If they answer first, you get a notification: "Your turn".
- Once you've both answered, read each other's replies and react with an emoji.
- After you answer, tap the heart to keep the question in Saved, the book icon at the top of Today. Saved keeps both answers.
Your progress shows as a path, one question per day. The counter, such as "16 of 30", shows how many questions you've both answered. A question stays open until you've both answered it, so a busy day doesn't break anything. When you finish a category, pick the next one, or start any category over from the top of its path. Old answers stay on their days, and you can read them any time in the Story tab by tapping a date.
To get a nudge, open Settings, Notifications, turn on Daily Ritual under Rituals and pick an hour under Reminder. Phorb only sends it if you haven't answered yet.
Why it helps
Couples who know each other well keep learning. The Gottman Institute calls this building Love Maps: "Love Maps are how couples can stay curious about one another." Over time, you build a mental map of who your partner is, "their likes and dislikes, hurts and hopes" (How to Build Love Maps).
A question a day is a low-effort way to keep that map current. People change. Your partner's biggest worry, favorite memory or idea of a good Saturday may be different from what it was two years ago. One question doesn't take an evening, and writing your answer before you see theirs keeps both answers honest.
Daily Sync has nine categories of 30 questions each: How You Feel, Appreciation, Hard Days, Fun Together, Dreams and Plans, Making Peace, Intimacy, Who You Are, and Money and Home. To try a few before you install, use the check-in questions tool: it has 10 questions from each of seven of these categories.
Ideas to try
- Long distance. Answer during your own day, then talk about both answers on your evening call. If one of you travels, Phorb keeps the question on your home time zone, and you can switch home to where you are now.
- Busy weeknights. Answer on the bus home. You'll have one real topic for dinner before you even sit down.
- After a disagreement. Pick a lighter category for a few days. A funny question can make it easier to talk again.
- A slow weekend. Read back through a month of answers in Story and pick one to talk about over breakfast.
- Questions worth keeping. Save the ones you want to ask again in a year and see what changed.
